A day on the road with no map
Today I spent driving across Montana. “Big sky” indeed-clouds pregnant with rain to the left, cotton ball clouds straight ahead, angry clouds to the right. Montana would be a great place to test cars that drive themselves! One does not need a map when driving across Montana.
I did stop to see friends from Holden Village. I had not seen Kay and Paul Hansen since 1977. We had a lot of catching up to do and lots of memories to reflect on. A quick stop for lunch turned into a delightful afternoon of conversation.
As I was driving along the endless straight away known as Hwy 94 I thought of Joyce Rupp’s poem that was given to me when I retired.
Old Maps No Longer Work
I keep pulling it out-the old map of my inner path. I squint closely at it, trying to see some hidden road that maybe I’ve missed, but there’s nothing there now except some well-traveled paths. They have seen my footsteps often, held my laughter, caught my tears.
I keep going over the old map but now the roads lead nowhere, a meaningless wilderness where life is dull and futile.
“Toss away the old map,” she says. “You must be kidding!” I reply. She looks at me with Sarah eyes and repeats, “Toss it away. It’s of no use where you are going.”
“I have to have a map,” I cry, “even if it takes me nowhere. I can’t be without direction.”
“But you are without direction,” she says, “so why not let go, be free?” So there I am-tossing away the old map, sadly, fearfully, putting it behind me. “Whatever will I do?” wails my security. “Trust me,” says my midlife soul.
No map, no specific directions. No “this way ahead” or “take a left.” How will I know where to go? How will I find my way? No map? But then my midlife soul whispers; “There was a time before maps when pilgrims traveled by the stars.” It is time for the pilgrim in me to travel in the dark, to learn to read the stars that shine in my soul. I will walk deeper into the dark of my night, I will wait for the stars, trust their guidance, and let their light be enough for me. (Joyce Rupp)
It is time for the pilgrim in me to discern where the stars will guide me. Where will my north star take me? With no map?
